The Caveman’s Valentine (2001)

Copyright by the Doomster 2003

Rating (1 to 10) : 6

Summary: Samuel Jackson shows that he shouldn’t be typecast with his performance in this movie.

This movie showcases Samuel Jackson’s acting talent far better than any movie he has been in. Watching him perform in this movie makes you realize how talented he really is, that he is more than an actor who usually plays the tough, hard-boiled, smart-ass black guy in either a comedy or action movie: “Pulp Fiction”, “Die Hard With a Vengeance”, “The Long Kiss Goodnight”, et al, all movies in which Jackson played this semi-typecast role. In this film, Jackson branches out as he portrays an insane yet intelligent man who is not malicious but rather marches to a radically different drummer than the rest of the world. His diction and facial tics which convey the behavior of a jumpy, paranoid person are a reflection of his thespian skills.

Jackson plays Romulus Ledbetter, a paranoid schizophrenic who lives in a cave in Central Park. He’s no ordinary homeless person – not someone with an addiction problem or down on his luck but a person who suffers from delusions; hallucinations of his wife Sheila (Tamara Tunie, Ms. Marcus in “Rebound: The Legend of Earl ‘The Goat’ Manigault”) appear at opportune times to advise him, chide him, or ridicule him. He can change from a shy, unsure, and self-conscious person to a raving lunatic if something triggers these “brain typhoons”, as he calls them. We find out that he was once a talented and aspiring pianist studying at the famous Julliard but now he only composes music in his head, with the help of these moth-seraphs that he claims reside in his skull. Romulus (Rom) now thinks that an omnipotent evil that he calls Stuyvesant is out to destroy him and that Stuyvesant monitors him by emitting yellow “Y-rays”. These Y-rays can read, poison, and control a person’s mind and to Rom, almost everybody else in the world is under Stuyvesant’s evil influence without knowing it. Worse, Stuyvesant has a new green “Z-ray”, more potent than the “Y-rays”.

The central mystery of the movie starts when Rom finds a dead, frozen body in a tree outside of his cave one morning. He calls his daughter, Lulu (Anjaunue Ellis), a police officer. The cops arrive and Rom tries to convince the disbelieving investigators that the death was the dirty work of Stuyvesant. The victim is identified as Scotty Gates (Sean MacMahon), a model/employee for a famous photographer named David Leppenraub (Colm Feore), who specializes in shooting dark, sinister photographs, and the police classify his death as accidental due to the victim freezing to death while sleeping outside. Soon afterwards, Rom finds Matthew (Rodney Eastman), friend of the deceased Scotty, and Matthew reveals to Rom his suspicion that Leppenraub had him killed. He further reveals that Leppenraub sexually abused Scotty & made a videotape of the sexual encounter so he would have a video for his viewing pleasure. Matthew also tells Romulus that Scotty had a copy of the videotape and tried to blackmail Leppenraub with it, giving Leppenraub a motive to kill Scotty.

Romulus decides to find out how Scotty really died and who was the perpetrator of the killing. No one believes his suspicion that it was Leppenraub so Romulus schmoozes with the art socialites at Leppenraub’s private farm in upstate New York. Romulus digs around Leppenraub’s place and is assisted by visions of his wife. This is where the movie gets weak. The movie is based upon a mystery novel by George Dawes Green and the complexities and subtleties of the novel are lost as it is transposed into film. While the novel might show the plot as logical (I haven’t read the book so I don’t know), the plot of the mystery, as shown by the film is convoluted. It’s as if the plot is saying that the who-dunnit plot is so vermicular that only an irrational person like Romulus could figure it out.

The movie also does not reveal how Romulus went from a budding pianist to a person living in a cave; there are hints that he was afraid of performing onstage but no clear answers. Maybe his moth-seraphs didn’t like it. I don’t know – maybe this part is more fully explained in the book and edited out in the movie for pacing. But showing this facet of Romulus would have added to his character.

There is a good performance in the supporting role by Anthony Michael Hall, (Brian Johnson in “The Breakfast Club”), who plays Bob, a bankruptcy lawyer who gets to know Romulus by loaning him a pen so he could compose some music. At first, Bob seems to be a sympathetic character not quite sure if Rom is completely off the deep end or just a hustler. Later, even he is amazed by the talent Romulus exhibits with the piano.

Why you should or should not see this movie:

You should watch this movie to really see the range of Samuel Jackson’s acting talent. Just don’t expect the movie plot to be astounding.

Memorable quotes

Romulus: “You can’t impose divinity on a chord. A chord’s divinity has to come from the inside out.”

Leppenraub: “All great art is borne of suffering.”

Moira: “You’re psychotic aren’t you?”

Romulus: “I have brain typhoons.”

Moira: “Brain typhoons?”

Romulus: “Swarms of moth-seraphs howl in my skull. Lies vex them.”

Moira: “Well then, you’ll understand if I don’t invite you in.”